The cursed house

It all seemed so good when we moved in... the jacuzzi, the pool, the indoor braai.
Ah but there were warning signs. Like the fact that the previous tenants had a life size painting of a faun (goat/man thingmajig - I think it's a faun but I'm a little behind on mythological folk so who knows). Or the fact that the estate agent has PINK pencilled on eyebrows and was downright rude to us from the start.

Well ten months later the pool is STILL brown - it was broken when we moved in, they got some cheapo fix job which lasted a month and it has been broken ever since, we have been robbed 4 times and I am ready to get violent with the pink eyebrow wench.

In spite of the pool being as it is, in spite of us asking for increased security (which we will happily pay for) since August and being told (SINCE AUGUST) they are busy getting quotes, in spite of the fact that they KNOW I'm pregnant, she is giving us attitude still. The Band let her know we'll be moving out at the end of the contract period. She replies that the garden is not in an acceptable state and we have 7 days to sort it out. Now we have a regular garden service so I genuinely don't know what she means, but as the Band pointed out, if she comes to inspect any part of the property she has to MAKE AN APPOINTMENT to do so. But nevertheless, WHAT ABOUT THE BLUDDY POOL AND THE BLUDDY LACK OF SECURITY AND THE FACT THAT AN AXE WAS LEFT ON MY DRESSING TABLE ON ONE OF THE MANY TIMES THIS PREGNANT WOMAN WAS BURGLED?????

I am going to Hello Peter her ass the second we are out of there!!!