People, in a mere 2 months i am due to pop.
I am super excited to:
• Be able to close my jeans again
• Be able to wear hot bras again
• Be able to stop drinking gaviscon by the litre
• Be able to not be at work (woohoo)
• Be able to climb stairs without starting to pant
• Be able to go for a jog
• Be able to use all the cool and super higher grade baby gadgets that people
have bought us
• Be able to not feel slightly physically insipid and weak the whole time
• Be able to not have to pee constantly
• Be able to get through any social occasion without being asked: "when are
you due? How has it been? Any morning sickness? Do you know what it is? Do
you know what you're in for!? Natural birth or caesar?" (followed by the
inevitable horror stories of both)
Now fear not... I realise that these wont all be instant improvements, but I'm assured that the heartburn and the breathlessness DO disappear instantly and that is good enough for me! The rest I can work on.
I am OF COURSE excited to meet the bambino and finally see if he's a he or she's a she, but that all feels very surreal and hard to imagine at this stage.
Do you guys remember the Earth Hour competition that I pleaded, cajoled, manipulated all into helping me win? I told you I won it right? So anyway, the Band and I will be spending a week here: ![]()
all expenses paid and doesn't count as leave. The catch? It's from 29 August - 5 September in Plettenberg Bay. I will be 38 weeks pregnant. You can be dam sure I'm going anyway! No two ways about it. And hey, if i pop in Plett so be it!
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
2 months and counting
thoughts of
Caz
at
9:45 AM
3
from you
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
Unravelling the mystery
It all started with a big bang. BANG!
And following that musical interlude...
I LOVE YOU GUYS! It's FANTASTIC you are clueless about compactums! I was clueless until about 3 months ago. I mean seriously, the word "compactum" sounds suspiciously similar to constipation in my opinion. And when one thinks about it... well, never mind that. If you are looking for toilet references go visit Ches, but you won't find them here!*
So, my precious little fellow ignorami, what is a compactum, you ask. Well a compactum is pretty much a surface that is high enough to change/bath a baby without breaking your back. It usually has shelves and stuff built in for storage, but that's the gist of it. Now don't ask me why it needs it's whole own poncy name. I find it borderline offensive... it just sounds rude "compactum". ugh. But the world of pregnancy LOVES to gooi all kinds of never-before heard lingo at us poor, deer-in-the-headlights pregnant peeps. As it is we are dealing with pregnancy amnesia (it's a medical truth people - check me!)now we have to learn words like lanugo and vernix and compactum and oh don't get me started on merconium.
*ok fine, so I contradicted myself by mentioning merconium, but 99% of you didn't know that so i figure that one doesn't count. But listen, if I ever turn into one of those "Ooh he made a solid one today" sorts please do something dramatic to me. I'm not sure how dramatic you can really get through cyberspace, but you're a creative lot, you'll think of something.
thoughts of
Caz
at
8:53 AM
6
from you
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
Nesting up a storm
People please accept my humblest apologies for being such a crappy blogger. Last week I was all like "must prove my worth to this company, must work my ass off", this week I'm all like "must get everything ready for The Bump's imminent arrival immediately". I never claimed to be stable. Anyway, perhaps one day I'll go back to my usual state of "must blog coz it's cheaper than a shrink".
So last week I was up in JHB for work. The mothball (my mom) was here for the weekend and it was great though exhausting. Honestly I don't know where that woman gets her energy. It's both inspirational and scary. On Saturday we got more done in terms of baby stuff than I have done in the past 7 months of pregnancy. No exagerration at all sadly! My parental units spoilt us with a bunch of stuff including a pram, car seat and the frikken rolls royce of baby monitors (if it could just change nappies...)
The Band was busy all weekend building cots and compactums and stuff. He is now Bob the Builder. Very cute.. er.. I mean manly having him all covered in saw dust and using machines I never knew existed.
The Mothball and I painted and varnished and sanded. Ok, not so much with the sanding but that sentence seemed to need a third verb.
Here is the finished compactum (cot is still being finished off):
muchos impressive, no?
Ordered my reusable planet saving (cash saving) nappies today from inkland (ya ya ya I know I know. I don't have the energy to defend my choice so I'll just let you know how it goes in reality ok?) so we have gone from having a couple of vests and stuff last week to being just about well and truly sorted this week. Don't know why after being little miss laid back the whole time so far I have now manifested into someone who NEEDS TO HAVE EVERYTHING READY NOW.
Baby: You are not invited to pop any time soon. Stick it out another 2 months please - else my maternity leave will be up mid December which will be completely inconvenient.
Speaking of The Unborn One - went for a scan last week and apparently the baby is weighing in at a solid 1.6kg. That's big in my opinion. It's UBER weird seeing my stomach move and being able to feel a foot. Weird, but quite cool.
thoughts of
Caz
at
3:00 PM
6
from you
Monday, June 29, 2009
Attitude
A good one. It's what I'm trying to have. Not about Life In General. No, no, Life In General is fantastic. Got the Band back from foreign locales, got the baby who apparently thinks he/she is a contender for the next Confed Cup, got the homely home which I love, got the Mothball - that's my mom people, try to keep up :O)- visiting this weekend. Life In General is a happy place to be.
It's work that is... challenging. I realised this when I spotted on my boss's calendar that I would in all likelihood not be seeing her for the next 3 weeks and felt delirious happiness. That's not a good sign, is it?
I am currently busy trying to navigate the treacherous valley of delicateness that is my work condition post-maternity leave. ugh. What I'm proposing is that they let me work from home primarily but obviously come in for meetings and when necessary. I'll have a full time someone with the bambino, but I still don't feel right about leaving a 3 month old home all day minus his or her mom. So I'm hoping that the controlling old school powers-that-be are won over by logic and you know, the fact that we are running out of office space and I am about to go from my own office to sharing (BLEGH) because we are so short of space, plus the fact that we should encourage working from home as a principle in terms of reducing carbon footprint etc etc etc. Plus the fact that people are more productive from home.
Anyway I am freaking a bit. If they say no I'm not sure what I'll do... Unpaid leave - we can't afford it. eep
thoughts of
Caz
at
3:01 PM
5
from you
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Guys I tried
I really did.
I tried to put together a mini-post on my cruddy Sony Ericsson, but alas twas not to be. I've been sick, you see. Bronchitis has had me in bed far away from decent internet connection.
So a quick recap on the last week and a bit to get you up to speed...
Had great weekend in Kei Mouth. Was very well looked after and the mothball (thats my mom) organised a little baby shower for me so the bambino is now decidedly more sorted!! Very very cute little outfits. Was great to see my family and friends from home.
The adorable neice was up for waking up whoever she could at the crack of dawn every morning. Eventually after being rerouted by each of us in turn "Why don't you go lie with granny and grandpa for a while..." one morning she gave up on the humans and decided to serenade my dog... the off-key melody of "YOU ARE MY PHOOOOEEEEEBEEEEEE, my only PHOEBEEEEEEEE, you make me HAAAAAAAPPPPYYYYYYYYYYYY, when skies are greeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey" could be heard reverberating through the house.
I got flu while i was there and on the flight back I reckon people thought I was in labour - the ear ache was excrutiating and I resorted to using labour breathing techniques to get me through the flight.
Anyway since I got back I have moved house, the Band has returned at last from Madagascar and I have been in bed.
And before you think to yourself "seriously, that's the post? I waited over a week for that?" you just consider how you'd feel on medication, sick, blocked up and in your 3rd trimester. That's right. shame on you for judging me!
thoughts of
Caz
at
11:43 AM
10
from you
Friday, June 12, 2009
Nearly there..
so i'm sitting in the airport with monstrous backache having some kind of nasty hot flush caused by the insanely speedy manner in which i downed my milo which I was forced to drink to try and cope with the heartburn induced after the super salty "chippery" chips (R15... sorry i mean 15 BLUDDY ront!!) I had to scoff when I discovered that I had somehow gained a bluddy hour (when does that happen) and it was still a few years til i got fed onboard the plane and this is all AFTER being here for ages already catching up on all my email, reading a couple of chapters and mooching around in general.
Whereforth do I sojourn?
To the Eastern Cape. WOOHOO. Almost makes the hot flush, heartburn and back agony worth it. Yep - they're all still here. soddit.
And Ches, can I just play the victim and point out "At least you can HAVE pain killers" the ONLY pain killers a knocked up chick is allowed are Panados. PANADOS!!!!! ha! you thought Myprodol were lame.
Anyway. Back to the fantastical weekend I have planned.
In case I didn't mention, The Band is currently in Madagascar and I am missing him insanely. Disturbingly, since he has been gone I am actually sleeping through the night which I feel both relieved and mildly guilty about... surely I should sleep better when he's around??? But I assured him it was a deep-seated subconscious defence mechanism - i refuse to wake up my usual twice an evening coz I would never get back to sleep without him! (He seemed mildly satisfied with that explanation).
Anyway, so much digressing. Ah yes. So my folks, and some of my other family AND PHOEBE MY GORGEOUS DOG are all going to Kei Mouth for the weekend and are flying me up to join them. YAY!! My dad has been counting down the sleeps for about a month and it will be the first time they all see The Bump. Plus I will have 3 little slaves at my beck and call - little cousins and my niece. I will, no doubt wake up to 3 pairs of eyes staring intently into my face at a disturbingly close range at 5am-ish and sighing loudly and repeatedly, but it will be worth it.
I am soooo excited to be oohed and aahed over, fed and pampered. There really is no place like home, most especially when you are the GOLDEN GIRL who is about to provide a beloved grandchild!
thoughts of
Caz
at
5:39 PM
5
from you
Restaurant Review: Buena Vista Social Cafe
So last night I went with a few colleagues to Buena Vista which is somewhere between Stellenbosch and Somerset West. As usual it was great. The decor is really cool - very authentic and atmospheric. Old pics of grannies smoking cigars, random candles burning black marks on the walls, mismatched pics and frames and odds and ends. Considering this is a franchise they have done really well to make it seem unique.
The food is what you'd expect from a cuban restaurant. Burritos, nachos, mojitos and a bunch of other "o's". But that's not what makes me loyal to the place. It's the personal touch that does it.
I have been to BVSC probably about 10 times or more since it opened - it's great for sundowners in Summer with the south american music blaring forth and also The Band and I developed a bit of a nachos obsession at some point so we were there a lot trying to satisfy that one :)
Anyway, last night I was there with colleagues. It was a great evening with the girls(though I was peering enviously at their mojitos while sipping on my somewhat dismal G&T minus the G!).
At the start of the meal I asked about the ice cream and chocolate sauce: is it hot chocolate sauce, or mere chocolate sauce? (Hey, there is nothing wrong with forward planning!) The waiter said it was mere chocolate sauce but he's fairly sure they could make a plan to upgrade it to hot chocolate sauce. Good man. I assured him that he need not be shy with the chocolate. Naturally throughout this exchange my friends gave the affectionate head tilt (to the left) and murmured "she's pregnant after all" in those soothing tones people usually use on the certifiably insane. I just smiled knowingly. I would ask such a question knocked up or not. It's elementary!
Anyway, when it came to it, a friend and I shared the Ice Cream and HOT Chocolate Sauce. It came with a fresh cherry on top. yuck. I offered it to the table but my friend stopped me: "Hey! Don't take my cherry!" To which we all cackled gleefully!
At this point the chef himself came out with a second jug of the good stuff - HOT chocolate sauce - and said "I believe someone here is eating for two?" Bless that good man.
I was just starting to tell the girls that this was the first time I'd come to Buena Vista without being given a free drink. I was midway through the story when the manager, Nick Slaughter, arrived with a tray of shooters... cherry liqueur and something else with a cherry on top for each of us. "Now you can all have your own cherries back" he said with a wicked smile.
WHAT A BEAUT!!
thoughts of
Caz
at
11:41 AM
0
from you
SA Tragedy: Part 2
So yesterday I went with Lily's mom - Khuselwa - to Stellenbosch Hospital for her meeting with the doctors involved. This sounds simple enough - for me I snuck out of work and took an extended lunch hour, but for Khuselwa it meant a R20 taxi fair from Tygerberg Hospital - where her child is now and where she is currently living! and for her sister, Shumi - it meant excusing herself from work. When you are living hand to mouth and earning R2000 in a good month these are not simple sacrifices.
We got there for the appointment only to be told the doctor was not available - he was busy at another hospital and would be there later but they couldn't say when. I explained to the appointment setter upper that that was not good enough - this mom has left her child to be here and best he ensure that the meeting happens TODAY and SOON.
In the meantime I took the ladies to Legal Aid. When we told the story the lawyers eyes just grew bigger and bigger. Next step is that they will find a law firm that specialises in case of medical misconduct and try get them to take the case on pro bono. My heart just about broke when Khuselwa discretely asked me if I knew what Legal Aid were going to charge her. Got to be careful not to take for granted that people understand things like Pro Bono!
The hospital called later to say the doctor was there. We went to get the low down from him. Amongst much waffling and jargon and me asking the same question over and over in a different way to get down to facts, the basic thing is this:
Gas was used on Lily and a number of other children that morning. All was fine and the anaethetist escorted her to recovery. She was not on oxygen as it was just gas and she was breathing fine on her own. Her oxygen levels were, however, being monitored.
A while later a nurse came to him and said the child was not waking up and she was concerned. He went back to recovery and the child was blue and the monitor registered her oxygen at zero. She was not breathing and had no pulse. He resuscitated her and gave her a shot of adrenalin to the heart. From then she was put on oxygen and transferred to Tygerberg Hospital.
He has no idea what caused her to stop breathing. He says it could be any number of things from a bit of tooth caught in her throat, to the child choking on vomit, to a heart error, to her moving her head as she began to wake up and cutting her own oxygen supply (which seems the most likely). The point is though, that what the hell is the point of an oxygen monitor is no one is watching it and if it does not have a function to alert if the levels drop. As Mrs Hall says, a child needs to be monitored throughout the anaesthesia process - including when they are waking up.
The anaesthetist brought up the fact that Lily was a prem baby and she is still small for her age - 8kg when she should be 12kg. He said this may have made her weaker and less able to respond. BULLDUST. That really got me. As Khuselwa said: Surely you had her file and you knew she was small? Is this the first small child you've worked with? Go Khuselwa. That is a bulldust argument because:
1. If there was any added risk with the child being small rather DON'T DO THE PROCEDURE! It's bloody toothache on a MILK TOOTH for goodness sake. Give the child panado and wait til it falls out rather than put a life at risk.
2. If the child WAS considered higher risk then surely she should have been even MORE closely monitored.
3. He then tried to say: what i mean is that if you strangle a healthy person and a sick person, the healthy one will be best able to cope with it. "Rubbish," I said, "the problem isn't the level of health, the problem is that the strangling happened. If you starve any brain of oxygen it will be damaged."
The reason this whole insinuation offended me so much was that I could see that it upset Khuselwa. As a pregnant woman I know that there is an implication that if you have a prem / low birth weight child it is your fault (and sometimes, frankly, it is) but the child is now 2 - she should never have been allowed to go without oxygen long enough to turn blue!!
If it is a capacity problem - shortage of nurses or whatever - then they should have allowed the mom in to sit with her child as she recovered. You can bet a mom will notice if her child stops breathing!!
Anyway, to be fair, aside from that stupid comment, the anaesthetist is tormented by this case. And the bottom line is that he cryptically implied that she should seek legal counsel.
Next it was a meeting with the medical superintendent. He was a lot more sketchy and evasive "It's not about pointing fingers, it's about looking at how we can do better". No no... if you don't figure out exactly what happened then how the hell do you prevent a rerun?? This isn't about not hurting feelings, it's about saving lives.
ugh.
anyway. that is basically that from Stellenbosch Hospital. From here on they won't give access to a report or anything unless Khuselwa goes the legal route.
The burning questions for me now are:
> what if Lily lives on and on with no improvement? what will that practically mean for her impoverished mom?
> what about all the other times that something like this has happened and there's been no-one to tell the family about Legal Aid etc? How many times have things like this been swept under the proverbial carpet?
thoughts of
Caz
at
9:19 AM
4
from you
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
South African tragedy
The Band always knows when something is big to me coz I take a long time to talk about it. I generally like to process stuff first but this one is far from sufficiently processed so perhaps writing about it will be therapeutic.
I have a fantastic housekeeper, maid, char, whatever the politically correct term is. For the foreigners among you: having a "cleaning lady" once or twice a week is more or less the norm in SA. It provides employment and is seen as a positive thing.
Anyway, Mavis is fantastic and has worked for us for about 2 years now and we are pretty close as far as an employer/employee relationship goes.
2 and a half weeks ago her niece (a 2 year old girl named Lili) had to go to Stellenbosch Hospital (a small government hospital)to have a tooth removed. Mavis's sister (Lili's mom) was told there was some sort of complication and so Lili was transferred to Tygerberg Hospital - a big provincial government hospital. The doctors there looked into it and did scans and so on and it seems that after going in for tooth ache, Lili is now severely brain damaged. The doctors say she is blind, deaf, unable to talk or even swallow. She is basically catatonic. Days went by with no improvement and on that Saturday the doctors decided it was time to take her off life support. Her family was told she could die immediately, or in minutes or in hours. A week and a half later she is still alive.
This story is tormenting me. I didn't know Lili before - except for what Mavis had told me about her, but the utter injustice and waste of it keeps me up at night.
On Sunday I went to the hospital. I wanted to see what the story was for myself and also to pray for this child. The children's ward at a public South African hospital is a heart breaking place. I saw babies smaller than the one I am carrying lying in the open - no incubator or blanket. The nurses and doctors are lovely and clearly care about what they do, but the facilities are just no good.
Lili is a beautiful child, really gorgeous big brown eyes that are mostly vacant but every now and then they seem to focus which gives you hope. The doctors give no hope beyond a miracle. I will keep praying for that.
A friend of a friend is a paediatrician at the hospital and so she called him for me. He knew exactly which child she was talking about immediately and said "off the record" that it was gross negligence on the part of Stellenbosch Hospital - something to do with a lack of post-operation monitoring which resulted in oxygen starvation and then severe brain damage.
Guys how the hell is it possible that a kid has a toothache and comes out severely brain damaged??
Anyway, the sad reality in SA is that the poorer people are very accepting. The mom is not particularly angry, just sad and confused. I am attending a meeting at Stellenbosch Hospital tomorrow with Lili's mom at which they are discussing the case and tomorrow afternoon I will go with her to Legal Aid. The off-the-record doctor says that they should be able to either sue the hospital or the state for millions. I haven't said that to Mavis and her sister. I've just said that we need to make sure that this never happens to anyone else.
Guys I'm in this one for the long haul. It is not ok that because these guys are poor the hospital gets away with this. If this was a white kid in a private hospital it would be front page news! I'm in media relations and I'm not above taking this to the media if that's what it takes to get some sort of justice for this family.
thoughts of
Caz
at
8:57 AM
6
from you